For most of my 40 years on this planet, I was conditioned by the patriarchal paradigm of our societal conditioning. One of those core beliefs being that in order to prove your value/worthiness/deservingness, you must work your fucking ass off regardless of how tired you are and weather or not it feels good, right or aligned for you. 

This is immensely toxic masculine way of being. And it goes back GENERATIONS. 

Guess what….

You’ve been lied to. 

This is not how you create happiness, success or wealth. It’s quite the opposite. You were NOT designed or built to live this way, especially if you are a woman (hello 8000 nerve endings in the clit). 

This way of living is KILLING YOU. It’s literally making you SICK. And it’s sucking the fucking life right out of you. This is why you are overwhelmed and exhausted. You don’t have to live like this anymore.  

Your divine birthright is ease and pleasure. 

You are meant to...

Over the last 3 years I have been on a journey to let my life be easy which meant I had to surrender, surrender, surrender and surrender again. 

I committed to stop willing myself to do ALL the things (defined will in Human Design) and to live my life aligned and in flow. I promised to....

Stop pushing and forcing. 
Not "do" through the resistance. 
Reduce my stress. 
Not feel responsible for everyone and everything. 
Not take on all the emotional labor in my family. 
Release martyrdom. 
Release codependency. 

Because operating from the place of "I have to do XYZ." actually stems from scarcity and lack. 

The internal stories of...

"If I don't do it, no one will." is your ego trying to prove you are superior or good enough because you subconsciously don't believe you are good enough. 

"Let me just do it for you." is actually you trying to feel like you have value so that you can be loved/have significance. Because without proving your...

A few weeks ago, I shared that balance is an inside job. Before we experience the external balance of our ideal time and energy management schedule, we must first acknowledge our heart's desires. Then we must give ourselves permission to acknowledge our desires. Next the goal is to align our actions and choices with our desires. This is clearly easier said than done or we would all be living our best lives, right? But awareness is the first step. Just acknowledging that there are (likely many) places in your life that you deny yourself pleasure gets you closer to saying yes to your desires. I mean, do you even know what you really, truly want? I know I didn’t for a long, long time.

Choosing pleasure begins with something as simple as acknowledging what your body needs and then honoring it - going to bed when you are tired, going pee when you have the urge, eating when you are hungry and drinking water when you are thirsty. These seem so basic and common sense,...

I had a dream recently about my birthday. And how every year, I just act like I don't really want a party because I’m afraid I’ll be disappointed.  When in actuality, I am still disappointed because my birthday felt lame or like I wasn't really celebrated.

The truth is, I have always wanted someone to throw me a surprise party. But I have never told anyone this or even believed it was possible. Again, I didn't want to be disappointed.

The last several years (read: decade), I have not been celebrated by others nor have I celebrated myself. No coincidence, right?

It’s the, “Why try?” defensive mechanism to protect my ego from that potential disappointment. You know the one that says you can't have what you want so why even try.

What might it mean if I invited my friends and family to a party to celebrate me and people I value and love didn't come?

They don't like me.
They don't love me.
I’m not important enough.

But what if they all came to...